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Counseling
A
young woman who is troubled by an unplanned pregnancy is likely facing a very difficult decision.
In fact, it will probably become the single most important decision of her life.
Whatever the final outcome, there will be repercussions that last a lifetime and will affect several people.
With that in mind, the upmost care needs to be taken, when approaching the options available to a mother in distress
over her pregnancy.
In optimum conditions, there will be many months in
which a woman can explore all the options available to her. Research shows
that decisions made in crisis situations are more often regretted. However,
the bottom line is, no matter how much time available, there will be only four alternatives.
1) terminate the pregnancy 2) raise the child 3) find a relative or close friend
who is in a position to raise the child (kinship adoption) 4) make an adoption plan
Young mothers in desperate circumstances sometimes put off making a decision as they are hoping that another option
will present itself. Unfortunately, the outcome will fall into one of the
four categories just listed, no matter how long she hopes for another alternative.
There are many resources available on the internet,
in books, and through agencies, attorneys, and physicians. Some of these
will certainly present with a bias, and that is to be expected. The important
factor is to gather information from sources with opposing viewpoints. A
young mother who seeks out arguments on both sides of the equation, will wind up finding the argument that best represents
her own inclinations.
While relatives and friends may voice strong opinions, it is important that a young mother follow through with
the decision that she can live with. Ultimately, she and the unborn child
will be the most dramatically affected. While extremely important to talk
through the alternatives, it is equally important to seek out a confidential resource that is neutral.
In other words, to find someone who has nothing to gain by whatever outcome occurs.
Today, all professionals agree upon the necessity for a woman faced with a difficult decision of this nature, to have
an independent therapist. Again, whatever the outcome, there will be psychological
distress. Working through these emotions while they are occurring, bodes the best possible outcome for the mother.
By Leslie Pate McKinnon,
L.C.S.W.
Leslie is a general practice psychotherapist specializing in triad issues surrounding complex adoption.
Leslie has more than 30 years of experience in field of adoption. Her office is located in Atlanta, Georgia, and she
may be reached at 404-603-5335, or by email at lesliepatemckinnon@gmail.com.
wwww.lesliepatemckinnon.com
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